I Heart Revolution

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

fBaRmOiKlEyN

BROKEN family. that is what my title reads.

meeting people from all walks of life really widens my perspective. i am appalled to find out that many of my friends grew up in broken families. i know from news reports and statistics that broken marriages are on a high, but they come across to me as only numbers. hearing it from friends sent reality knocking on my door.

after some thought, i am overwhelmed with emotions, melancholiness mixed with anger. if there is a devil, then the damned thing deserves to be cursed for breaking up families, killing loved ones and hence depriving children of a healthy and wholesome family life.

i know of 4 friends whose parent died prematurely. 2 of which in freak car accidents, 1 to illness and the other not made known to me. i know of more people whose parents are separated. i also know of friends whose parents are not separated, but act as if they are or worse still, constantly at war with one another. each time i listen to their stories, i feel so much in pain, for them and for the fact that these have become prevalent trends.

the people who suffer the most, are those who suffer in silence - the children. speaking from experience, children who grow up in broken families tend to lack or lag. i am one good example. deep within, i grow up with this scab that is constantly vulnerable. many many times, this scab opens up and bleeds. yun puts it as, 'the root' and i believe the root is the inherent and subconscious yearning for love. i always believe God instituted a wholesome person to grow up with both mother's and father's love, both not replaceable nor dispensable. if one is missing, then its like a wall with a missing brick. such a wall might either continue standing without the brick, but remains weak and vulnerable or crumble.

that is why i won't allow the damned thing to have the upper hand. the more i want to read psychology in university and ultimately specialise in family psychology.

speaking of which - just the other day, i found out one of my friend's dad is a signal warrant officer. curious, i asked him how long his dad has been in the force. 20+, years he replied. my eyes brightened. my mum once told me that my dad once signed on as a signal specialist, but that was many years back. he quit. so, i asked my friend to ask his dad if he knew my dad. i don't know why i did that, because even if he did, what difference would it have made? i guess i was curious, my heart thumbed slightly faster when my friend asked his dad. all i know of my dad is bad, perhaps, i just want to know if anyone else has something else to say about 'this man'.




________
'FAMILY = Father And Mother I Love You'

- i not stupid too

2 comments:

^ said...

if there's a devil??? you mean, u're not sure if there's a devil? hey, i think u're really in some spiritual endangerment of backsliding & need to seek a mature christian to help you. & most imptly to seek God. but sometimes it's hard to get back on track by our own efforts...i think u need someone to pray with you. i'll try my best to support u in this area, but as you know, i'm not that power and still quite a newbie. but meanwhile, keep your eyes on God okay.

marc's the name said...

thanks, your support means a lot to me.